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Just a reminder to pray for NickyBears surgery Tuesday morning at Beaumont to close his tummy from where the feeding tude was, it would not close on its own and St Jude could not fit us in while there. So pray for a speedy recovery and surgery!

Back to Memphis, Nicky and I flew in a day early and Nick met us after Nicky was sedated.  As I posted a few days ago below the MRI is NED and Clear of Disease!!! AMEN ...While there I was able to visit 3 families inpatient, which made the extra day there go by much quicker. We started by seeing Baby Ronan V., he is in his 3rd round of chemo and day 8, and 9. It brought back so many memories being in that exact room, out of all the rooms this one I remember the most. Room 2077, There are certian things about Jude you can not erase and this was the room I was in starting Day 1 of round 4 of methotrexate. This room also echoed a very real anxiety and sadness .... it was there when our Doctor, Dr. Wight walked in hours later from hearing the news of Baby Wades scan..... I remember looking at her and saying, "You have the hardest job in the world .... I don't know how you do this everyday." She said, "With hope ... hope that we find better ways to treat the kids." She could tell I was a wreck and I think that is why she got us discharged so quickly that round. Nonetheless when Ronan's Mom said sit.... I could not and rather stand in my high heel boots and be uncomfortable.  But I was grateful to meet Baby Ronan and his Momma.

We then got to see Hallie C. she was sleeping, but I needed to go give her Momma a hug and just show her what a difference a year can make by showing her how our Nicky looks today and showing her a photo of a year ago. She was also on her Day 8 and 9 or round 2 and has a scan coming up, please say a prayer for her that she is NED!!! (no evidence of disease.)

We went into E-clinic and the play area and burnt off some time there, we missed a visit to see Arianna's family but I did get to see that princess at rehab the next day briefly. Nicky was filled with energy and loved running around Jude.  I could see other parents looking to see if he was a patient - the identifing marker is the blue bracelet that he was not wearing our first day there. I am sure people wondered where my other child was when passing us and seeing Nicky clearly looking like a picture of complete health. I remember sizing parents up wondering which child was the patient in the beginning.... most of the time the treating patients are bald, thin hair, NG-tube in their nose or feeding tubes running from their stomachs, or clearly deficits from surgery or treatment, sometimes both  - multiple markers pointing to the patient.

We finally headed back to Grizzle and caught up with Tyler B. who was scanning the same day as us. They played in the playroom and we talked about the kids from our protocol. There are so many to update on. It was so good to see Tyler, so full of life with his brown spikey hair looking healthy too. Upon leaving the hospital I was able to visit Willa Rose and her family and see such wonderful progress since her first days there our last visit 3 months ago. It is wonderful to see them achieving goals and gaining strength, even through treatment.

So as you know the MRI is NED and all is clear!!! PRAISE GOD! The ultrasound was not too bad to sit through and they saw nothing alarming So the only thing left  was for us to have our clearnance visit and say our goodbyes for another 90 days of freedom. To update on the kids that scanned this week, Brody S. scan is stable and we still need to pray it is once again NED. We also scanned with Tyler B. NED clear once again ... then there was Yesaahi  G.  in South Africa on our protocol and his scan was NED clear ... While Kylie O. I was told her scan showed minor progression - there are still cureable options left so please keep that little one in your prayers. Campbell's results showed that the chemo needs to be modified and so we pray... and we are waiting on Reese's news still. We ran into Scout L. who got a great scan too. Belle M. scans Monday, please pray for her and Luca P. will be coming up shortly with Christian S. next week. And Little Anna L. scans on the 6th too.

Crazy enough while waiting that Wednesday night in the lobby of Grizzle House, it was filled with all of the faces of 6 months ago at Target House when we needed to take cover from a Tornado and Reese and her family and Kylie and her entire family were there .... what odd timing we were personally off by a week, but it was still good to see so many faces there that we knew. We even got to see Isaiah P. and his Momma there for HBOT treatments and doing much better.

We met a family that lost their son a year ago while waiting in the lobby for Nicky's ultrasound and when they asked questions about Nicky, we asked questions about a little girl that was only 1yrs. old  that looked healthy. They told us they had lost their son a little over a year ago, 6 weeks before giving birth to their daughter. Out of fear they chose to scan her at 1 yrs old. in their local town, that scan showed something so there they sat AGAIN at St jude.... my heart literally hurt so much thinking of them all day ... I apologized to them and said no family should ever be here, but to even sit in this room twice, Lord please let this be a clean scan! The mother emailed me back, I was so happy to learn that scan was CLEAR ... thank you Lord. This is their son's story http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamesvidrine Pray for their daughter Adeline to always remain PERFECTLY healthy ...

So we came home and were able to decorate our tree with peace in our hearts. This is something I could not do until we came home, so the tree sat empty for 10 days waiting for us when we came back.

While we feel so blessed we learned of our dear friends father, Steve Goldman's father  was given months to live with Metastasis Pancreatic Cancer.  We learn this moments after getting our good news and our hearts hurt for you all, you supported us and prayed for our boy and now we are praying for you. Not only that but another child's post came in the day we arrived, Aaron Gray and his Momma was the last donation for Nickys CURE SEARCH WALK to put us to ourt goal this is his entry in his journal http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/aarongray - Lord hold this family up!

Nicky brought a bug back from St Jude and Christian and I were so sick vomitting from 1am Friday -10:30am Saturday, Super Daddy Nick had to put on a Cape and take care of everyone, there's a first for everything!!! .... we couldn't make it to church but we learned that the Jackson family lost their sister Flo to Ovarian Cancer this morning.  There are too many names to list of children and loved ones fighting or whom we have lost from cancer in the last year and a half ... it has been a tough to love so many and hurt with so many, and wake up and fight the thoughts everyday that could steal all the wind from your day.

What I know is God is GOOD ..... we will never be able to grasp all that we endure, what I know is that God uses us and uses our lives and stories to teach each other lessons in every single way. Out of the most pain, we learn the most ... wish that was the absolute opposite .. but it simply is not how this world works.

Dear Lord,

We thank you for allowing us peace of mind to come home and celebrate the holidays! Please show mercy on so many families hurting right now .. your love is ALL HEALING .... ALL POWERFUL ... and we ask that you lift up all the families mentioned in this post .... show your unfailing love and your mercy ... Father .... we leave all things in your Hands always .....Please look over NIcky during his surgery and Beaumont this Tuesday morning to close his tummy that just would not heal on it's own!! Make his healing quick Lord ....