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Updates

mott2

After finding out U of M never sent our scan last week, Friday they told me it was overnighted and would arrive Monday - it did not. They did ship it but did not rush it - I was so stressed that I pulled the entire scan folder from my disk I had and zipped it and sent a link to my doctor praying she would look at it and not wait for the actual CD to arrive. She did tonight....

mottI just got the call a few hours ago with our official news about the inflammation in Nicky's spine. Because of the way Nicky has healed from the surgery he has what is called syrinx (which is the inflammation that is present) it is likely related to the acquired chiari and tight craniocervical junction. What this means to explain it better is that from where his tumor was located, his brain dropped slightly during healing over the past two years. It is now slowly causing this inflammation to be present in the spine. The scan showed that the inflammation has moved up two vertebrae's so it is slowly becoming an issue that will require a surgery for posterior fossa decompression at some point. Dr. Boop our neurosurgeon reviewed the scans today also and we will be planning surgery during our next Memphis MRI in October. While we do not invite this news today, we are grateful it is corrective and that this is not cancer, that this is not something worse.

We are extremely sad to have to put him through another surgery, hospital stays and pain managing that we have managed to avoid since leaving St Judes - we will be right by our little mans side. Pray for us in preparation for this to go smoothly and that his recovery is quick. My stay in Memphis will be longer than I am use to but I am ready to do whatever is needed for my boy.  This is not and in and out procedure, this is surgery and so we ask that you pray for our little NickyBear and that his scan also remains cancer free.

We are not certain of the dates yet of the trip as they may change due to this surgery, we will keep you posted. We knew eventually we would have to cross uninvited bridges from treatment, it seems all the children that are blessed enough to get through treatment have to endure different obstacles at different times.... We Thank God DAILY for the gifts of life the blessing that our Nicky is here, it all comes at a cost that we wish we could pay for him instead of him ever having to endure any of it.

GOD PLEASE WATCH OVER OUR BABY BOY!

Long week since Tuesday's scan. I know many of you are praying and waiting to hear and update and yesterday after hearing nothing from our St Jude team, I called U of M and after 3 different departments kept switching me to different areas of the hospital the records department had no order to send the scan to St Jude. You can imagine that I was upset since we had been waiting all week and while in recovery the nurse confirmed that Jude was to get the reports and images.

So they are overnighting it on a friday which means they won't have it until Monday. Meanwhile the report was faxed to them and well I had it also faxed to us also. I feel confident to say there are no cancer concerns - which I was really disappointed that my doctor didn't call to at least tell us that. However the scan was to compare the inflammation from the previous scan to this scan and you can't compare an apple to an apple without seeing it so they haven't called and won't until they review both together. I wish I had more news but reports are interpretations of the images by a someone that has never seen Nicky's scans before so they may note things that Jude is aware of and may not see things the same way to compare and while I am breathing a bit better after reading the report, having knowledge of what I am actually reading helps but we need official news from our doctor - when we have it - you know I will update as soon as I can.  I am sorry some of you have been worried, imagine us still waiting officially.... so please keep praying and I will update soon.

lucamomma
I'm so sad today, learning of this sweet boy Luca departing this world leaving his Momma and Daddies arms straight into the arms of Jesus last night at 6:45pm ....

I know I ask you to pray a lot but please pray for his family in the days to come that God fills their hearts with the strength they will need to move on. That God fills their every need during this painful time. I told Nicole today, the pain is no different every childs story is so different and you find different qualities you fall in love with - each lost I grieve. I love this photo of Luca and his Momma Eva ... so when you see me advocating and endlessly trying to raise awareness - these are the some of the faces I carry in my heart. I hope through my journey you will carry them too because every child matters, every life matters.

His Momma wrote this in her post :::

We are so thankful for Luca, the greatest gift a parent could ever wish for. We hope that he has inspired you to love deeper and have stronger faith. This life will pass in a blink of an eye and we will be together with Luca again.

Rest in peace
Luca Rafaele Paonessa 6/25/2008-7/21/2012

Hello everyone! Summer is just cruising by .... Nicky has his scan at U of M tomorrow morning of his spine, I ask that you please pray that the inflammation that was once present in the last MRI is completely gone now, and of course that there is NEVER any cancer period. He has had chronic ear infections since May - its seems as soon as we dodge one another one happens in the other ear which makes enjoying the water challenging for him because he just loves to be in the water. We will be meeting with ENT next week about his ears not closing since the tubes were removed and see what they think.

Other than that, its been a beautiful summer in Michigan this year. Nicky love boat rides and playing outside and he gets a kick out of teasing Haley our dog. He loves the pool and loves wrestling with Daddy and Christian. I have loved all the cuddling I get or random hugs are just the best! He must take after me because he LOVES to dance to music. He loves his movies and boy can he eat! He is getting bigger and stronger and more beautiful everyday. Please pray God continues to have His hands on our boy and that CURES are going to happen.

Please continue to Pray for the Paonessa Family, for strength in Luca's absence and for comfort and peace that only our Lord Can provide. I wanted to share this video of Luca with you all. His Daddy said something that I will never forget at his prayer service I attended.  His Daddy whom is a doctor said that at St Jude there is a wall with survival rates that are incredible - but my sons cancer wasn't on that wall, medulloblastoma - things need to change, while I listened I realized ependymoma isn't on that wall either. I am asking you to please help us change that by donating to the CURE SEARCH WALK at this link we will be walking soon, Sept 22 - Nickys 3rd Birthday - I hope you will join us in this fight! <3 I will update with the scan results when I get them, it may be a while since they will be sent to St. Jude to be reviewed. God Bless you all!!!

PLEASE DONATE HERE http://www.curesearchwalk.org/southeastmi/nickybear22

Its been summer .... we are enjoying the boys and Nick can not sit still, so Christian is always on the go with his Dad. Nonetheless, Nicky has been battling an ear infection for over 3 1/2 weeks in his left ear since the tube was removed. Endless weeks of meds is just no fun for him. He also caught a virus type cough among the 3 bacterias that he came up positive for from the ear culture. Its not easy trying to let him swim and yet he can have no water get in his ears. Thankfully his spirit hasn't been effected much by these both illnesses that could have taken away his energy.

We have still managed to stay out patient with no fevers or hospital stays! Thank you Lord. As mentioned over a month ago that Nicky would need an MRI to follow up with the inflammation in his spine on the last scan. After the run around from U of M it is scheduled for July 31st at 8am - we ask that you please pray this is gone, the idea of another procedure or surgery is just not something we want to think about. So please pray it is clear and we can rest until his next St Jude scan. I am a little nervous allowing anyone else to sedate him because St Jude spoils us and I hold him until he is asleep.

bay6We got up north for the 4th of july and we decided that we were going to release balloons for some of the children that we have lost to this fight .... This Yellow one was released for all the fighters - Nick is holding this and had the job of releasing them,

We are reminded every single day to thank God for just today. The news of Luca has my heart in pieces and I wrote about it in the post below, I just never emailed it out. Also, Tanner another child whom we have followed after 8 years cancer free has a radiation induced brain tumor that is lethal. Please pray for his family and for him. There are simply too many children to name off that are battling this disease again and again..... please pray for cures.

bay1

This is us on the 4th, we wore our American colors proudly. Nicky was not his normal restaurant friendly self so after 5 attempts we just ate in.  Glad to be home but then the power was in and out and then ... Poof! Gone .....I posted this on Facebook and I will post it here:::

We forget how very spoiled we are - when we have melt downs because our powers out and forget their are countries that don't have electricity at all. Or air conditioning - wow thats a big one in the last 24 hours when it was 101 yesterday and no air while we slept so uncomfortable while so many have never had none.... Its much like how a cancer parent sees our worlds ---- for those of you unaffected please be grateful you are so blessed because someone would give anything to have that blessing, likewise be mindful for those without the things so many take for granted ... blessing you rarely pay attention to because we have evolved into a spoiled society that takes too much for granted ... electric is back on ... air is fighting to climb back to 69 degrees ..... praying for CURES ... ?

bay3

bay4My point with posting it again here is - don't sweat the small stuff .... and remember almost everything is small stuff..... smile - thank God when you wake up that we live in a country that gives us freedom and we are capable of everything we dream if we just try and work hard for it .... not everything is in our control though and so we leave the rest in Gods Hands.....so just for today Lord .... thank you for the "GIFTS" we hold .....

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for moments and love and laughter .... I do not take for granted tomorrow and all that it may bring - I just am so grateful for right now being able to hold my boy .... please watch over Luca and his family hold them tightly and Tanners family as well ..... it is a brutal reminder that we must keep fighting for CURES ..... please donate or walk with us on Nicky's 3rd Birthday September 22, 2012 The link is below please consider donating or walking ..... this is the only time we are asking our friends and family to honor not only our son's journey but so many still fighting and the ones we have lost ..... God Bless you all .... NickyBears Momma ....

http://www.curesearchwalk.org/southeastmi/nickybear22

bay5.

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