Dexter Lawrence Authentic Jersey  May 10 - 21, 2011

Its been a crazy few weeks, lots of emotions .... Last Thursday the 12th his labs actually went down ANC 1240, hgb (red blood) 11.1 and platelets 162. It was a decent week, but it came with emotional pain as we lost another child on our protocol. I woke up to a text that said, J.W. got his little wings and is now in a better place. As you can imagine, this is not the news you want to get to start your day .... though he was on hospice and the reality was there, the thought of that Momma not able to kiss her babies sweet head heart my heart into pieces.  I cried most of the day as we had lost another St Jude child the night before named Claire.  John and Claire both fought the same type of brain tumor and later that day I was then hit with more bad news that I was unaware of, Sofia C. in the video below from my protocol was inpatient and relapsed. The disease had spread to her little tummy, lungs and kidneys. I kindly ask you to pray for Claire's family, for John's family and for Sofia's family..... what a rollercoaster the land of cancer is.

Some of you know that Baby Nicholas and I were invited out to New York for the finale of Celebrity Apprentice by Mr. John Rich whom is in the final two. I was a bit hesitant to say yes since the date of the show's live taping is May 22, 2011 exactly a year ago from the night we sat in ER and were told he had a brain tumor. But God has a plan .... and I can't let the date cripple me, or my efforts to advocate for the littlest soldiers fighting diseases and enrolled into a fight that they never deserved. I have begged you all everyday to change a simply profile photo on facebook to help create awareness. Thank God we have such AMAZING friends that love us and our super trooper. I may sound like a broken record, but every persons profile changed helped reach people that don't know what that grey ribbon means.

We had our weekly labs, it on Thursday May 19, 2011 ANC still isn't moving so ANC 1200 hgb (red blood) 11.1 and platelets 187 so everything except his ANC is moving up. After a moody 2 days from this chemo I called Nicholas' primary Dr. Wright and so last night she told us that missing the last few days in the grand scheme of things and a year of treatment to just stop chemo, So NO MO CHEMO as they say at Jude. It was an overwhelming feeling throwing away the rest of it and getting rid of the toxic materials to use with it. It was such a mixed day of emotions since Nick went golfing and called me and said, a year ago on this Friday was when I was playing golf and we ended up in ER .... my heart sunk .... I hate giving any power to these dates or moments ... but it makes you replay them and the numbing reality of the year replays.

We are headed down to the Westin and Metro Detroit airport to crash for the night since Nicky and I fly out at 7am we thought it would be fun and easier to just stay there.  So Nicky and I have a long day and night with NBC --- Please watch and let's pray that john Rich wins more $$$ for St Jude. Nickybear and I will fly into Jude the following morning so our visits start Tuesday .... Please pray for safe travels, and stable, clear scans that are Wednesday the 25th, his hearing test remains stable no change and that we can fly home in peace on Thursday night and breathe a little lighter ... GOD IS GOOD NO MATTER WHAT !!! Pray he gives Nick and I peace while we wait for the results ....

Please Jesus keep our boy cancer free.

Thank you all for following our journey, your support is so greatly felt!

Below is a pic from Nicholas' official St. Jude Photo Shoot .... it was 3 months ago so he is littler ... lol my sweet little man!

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